Water Cooler

Cristiano’s Lesson On Landing The Ladies

chris — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:28:36 +0000

Close the eyes, pucker the lips and just move in….

…while the lady slips to the left.

The Video That Belongs Somewhere but Has No Other Place to Go

Laurie — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 03:10:41 +0000

The combo of foot skills + music made me smile. This is Christian Castillo, who is apparently newly signed by the MLS club DC United. The first few seconds, against Columbus Crew defender Frankie Hejduk, are reportedly knows as the “Dance of Christian Castillo.”

Originally spotted on Crewture.

The Biggest Quality of Goal vs Quality of Commentary Mismatch in the History of Football?

Daryl — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 16:18:56 +0000

Will one day post this to the front page and say a lot more about it. But for now, just enjoy Johan Cruyff’s incredible goal. And the incredible(y bad) commentary.

Rhetorical Question: a figure of speech in the form of a question posed for its persuasive effect without the expectation of a reply

Laurie — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 19:13:06 +0000

Main Entry: rhe·tor·i·cal
Pronunciation: \ri-ˈtȯr-i-kəl, -ˈtär-\
Variant(s): also rhe·tor·ic \ri-ˈtȯr-ik, -ˈtär-\
Function: adjective
Date: 15th century

1 a : of, relating to, or concerned with rhetoric b : employed for rhetorical effect; especially : asked merely for effect with no answer expected

This conversation dates back to the Parisian riots after Algeria qualified for World Cup 2010 in November, and to this post, which contained the photo at left. The Champs-Élysées is lined with ritzy, luxe shops, but the Mont Blanc pen store was apparently the only one truly looted.

[11/18/2009 9:07:57 PM] Laurie: Also: Of all the shops on the Champs-Élysées, why would you loot the Mont Blanc pen shop?

[11/18/2009 9:08:57 PM] chris: They’re easily pocketable.
[11/18/2009 9:09:38 PM] chris: Don’t you hate it when rhetorical questions are given logical answers?

[11/18/2009 9:09:58 PM] Laurie: yes

[11/18/2009 9:10:17 PM] chris:(Sorry.)

Someone Stop Me Before I Analytic Again

Laurie — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 19:11:45 +0000

For those unfamiliar, Google Analytics is the highly addictive program that allows you to analyze where and how readers visit your site. Sources, landing pages, countries, cities, reader languages, google search strings? It’s all there.

Beware, though. Once you make the decision to enter, there goes your life.

from Laurie
to Chris ,
Daryl Grove
date Sat, Dec 5, 2009 at 12:51 PM
subject Weird question of the day
mailed-by theoffside.com

Weird question of the day: I’m trying to figure out why the site has had over 300 pageviews today for the Euro 2008 wall chart without any apparent linkage. Mostly just through google. Is it people looking for a World Cup wall chart?

I really shouldn’t let my mind turn loose on these things.

from Chris
to Laurie
cc Daryl Grove
date Sat, Dec 5, 2009 at 3:43 PM
subject Re: Weird question of the day

We need to remove you from the Google Analytics roster.

For your own good.

Wow. That’s a Big Ball.

Laurie — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 22:13:38 +0000

This arrived in our email this week from the good folks at Adidas. It’s the Santa Monica unveiling of the Jabulani, the ball for WC 2010. The guys are MLS players Jimmy Conrad (L) and Sacha Kljestan (R), with adidas North America President Patrik Nilsson.

But I’m probably just including it because I have the maturity of a twelve-year-old and like making jokes about…

Well, you know.

The English Are A Confident Bunch Who Can’t Spell.

chris — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 21:02:26 +0000

Confident/delusional. Whichever.

Well, at least the betting crowd are. They’re already looking forward to next summer with visions of a final dancing in their heads.

chris: You guys are already screwed:

The World Cup will be the first sporting event to break the one billion pounds ($1.66 billion) barrier in British betting turnover, said a leading bookmaker after making England second favourites on Friday.
[2:48:34 PM] chris: Not only that but they spelt favorites wrong.
[2:48:59 PM] Daryl: no coumment

Well, at least Brazil are favo(u)rites.

England, drawn against United States, Slovenia and Algeria in Group C, are quoted at 5-1 to win the trophy for the first time since 1966. European champions Spain are 4-1 favourites.

Err…

[Reuters]

Women’s Lingerie, Beckham’s Cologne, and How Not to Rob a House

Laurie — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 19:03:50 +0000

(Just for the record, I actually kind of like Nicole Merry, Thierry Henry’s ex, the model. But “Dirty Pretty Things”? Come on.)

[10:40:01 AM] Laurie: Also: titi’s ex now has a line of lingerie. Name: Dirty Pretty Things. I am not making this up.
[10:40:07 AM] Laurie: http://claire-merry.over-blog.com/article-36333311.html

[10:40:31 AM] chris: I can see why he divorced her.
[10:41:51 AM] chris: Why do people who aren’t fashion designers or the like feel the need to soil the world with their clothings and perfumes?

[10:42:12 AM] Laurie: I have often wondered that same thing. Victoria Beckham being Exhibit A

[10:42:25 AM] chris: Doesn’t Davey have a cologne?

[10:42:29 AM] Laurie: That he does.

[10:42:49 AM] chris: Who wants to smell like David Beckham? Unless he smells like money, which he very well might.

[10:43:13 AM] Laurie: Funny story, kind of. A friend’s house got broken into. Among the items stolen were A) their cat’s ashes, and B) the Beckham cologne she got as a joke for her footy-loving son.

[10:44:18 AM] chris: I trust they didn’t exactly follow the Danny Ocean Guide to Planning Robberies.

Sometimes The Best Goals Are The Ones That Never Went In.

chris — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 22:26:02 +0000

Do The Didier Deschamps

chris — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 05:40:17 +0000

All the cool kids are doing it.